Questioning the Role Model

I mentioned last week how great it was to work at a school since there are teachers and counselors always on the look out to offer up guidance.  Well that can sometimes play against you as well.  A little background...this summer when Jess turned two I decided that I needed to get a new best friend and lose my old best friend "the muffin top."  I ran, took exercises classes, watched what I ate and low and behold it came off.  I am basically the weight I was prior to having kids. My fighting weight if you will.  Well...since many folks at work have only either known me pregnant or in various stages of fighting to lose my muffin top, this came as a shock when I returned back over summer. The rumors started to fly about me being ill, suffering from a eating disorder, etc, etc.  Now I know the people here love me so I have taken such comments as loving comments. 

Last week though...I was cornered (easy to do in my little office) by a co-worker also expressing concern and she brought up something that has been weighing on my mind.  She mentioned that me being so small is really not setting a good example for my girls.  That they are looking for me to set the body image norm and by being thin I am basically giving them the message that this is the size they should be.  Now it's one thing to have concern for me.  Again, I can appreciate that.  But as soon as you start throwing around my parent and putting that into question, that becomes an area I'm fairly sensitive about.  I pride myself about going out of my way to tell my girls how important it is to love themselves and to not be obsessed with external beauty.  We talk about how beautiful differences are.  How people of all shapes and sizes, colors and races are all wonderful.  So when this woman said this to me, I really got bothered and obviously a week later I'm still bothered. 

I can still remember as a kid my Dad pointing out that I was getting a chest.  And my family was always the first to point out a hair style they didn't care for or if I could stand to lose a few.   I can still remember how sad I felt to have those things brought to my attention.  I remember those feelings and I would never want my girls to feel like that. I think because of that I have tried to make sure they feel great. I support the style they want, the hair they want, and have always reminded them how important it is to shine on the inside.   Plus couldn't I argue that by exercising and eating right I am actually setting a good example for them. Well at least better than the Mom cramming a Big Whopper in her mouth calling that a delicious dinner. 

So... did I say anything to this concerned colleague?  Did I look her in the face and tell her that I think I am going an OK job, thank you very much.  Did I stand up with my hands on my hips and say that despite my personal faults, I go out of my way to be the best darn parent I can and to make those girls feel that they are loved and fabulously wonderful little people?  Nope.  I listened to her express her concern.  I told her there was no issue and thanked her for her concern and thought to myself, 'you don't know me, but thank you for my next weeks blog topic'.