Can't we all be the same

During the past year I have discovered probably the hardest part of being a parent.  Yeah the different personalities can be trying. The fact that you can't parent everyone the same, is huge as well.  But probably the hardest thing is when one of your kids is shining and the other is just floating along.

My girl Gabby is one of the most creative people (including adults) that I know. She is the worlds best friend, a kind soul, a true lover of life.  But when it comes to reading, that girl just doesn't get it.  Now, yes in the big scheme of life we can hope that will be her only issue. But trust me when your younger daughter is reading full blow novels and your oldest is still sounding out 'cat', that pulls a little on the heart strings.

What do we want most as parents? For our kids to be happy and not to struggle in life.  When you look down and see a disappointed and deflated little person it's sad.  And I can't help but feel slightly guilty.  Your kids are a product of you right?  Here we have Rick that read at 4 and Alex is a super star reader. Doesn't take a brain surgeon to know where that kid got her smarts.  Does that mean poor Gab is going to take after ole Mom?  I mean she's already excelling in social skills, my strength.  She has the quitter attitude, yep that's from me too.  Man oh man did she get the bad reader gene from me too?  I guess it's silly to think you only pass on the good stuff to your kids.  So I wonder if I'm more disappointed that she isn't picking up reading or am I more disappointed that she isn't picking up reading because of my brainiac genes running around in her head?  Now don't take that statement as admittance that I'm a full blown idiot.  I did manage to struggle through college and there are some things that I do very well.  Don't ask me to list them, I'm at a blank. See bad brain.  But I guess I was hoping that my kids wouldn't have to struggle in anything.   

Well if I have to flip it around at least I can say Gabby will know what its like to work hard.  If stuff comes too easy, people think they don't have to work at anything.  So I guess it's a good thing.  Character developing and all.

I keep telling her that in a few years she is not even going to remember struggling to read.  This struggle will be a distant memory.  But should I really be saying, 'this memory will be distant but there will be another struggle you're working on'?.   And in turn another ulcer for me.  Probably.  But I guess it's good to see your kid struggle and also to see how you deal with it as a parent.  Do you rise to the occasion and do everything humanly possible to help them?  Or do you sit wringing your hand asking why?  Well, if you're me, maybe a little of both.