Yeah it's not always a glamorous gig, but for the most part, it's pretty rewarding. My kids are my life line and truly make me laugh. So I hope to be able to capture with words and pictures the feelings of the day. They won't always be pretty, but like any Mommy knows, some days are like that.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Where has the time gone

Well my oldest is on the eve of her seventh birthday. How that time got away from me I will never know. Picture a loosely curled blond haired girl running through the sand, shouting at the birds, while laughing all the while. That is the best image I could think of to describe my girl. Her hair is curly and always wild. She has energy to spare. She is strong willed and opinionated, but oh so loving. Her laugh is highly contagious. If you couldn't tell I really like this little gal.

When I brought her home a whole 5lbs, 12 ounces, I thought this tiny being was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. She looked like a cross between my Mom and Rick. Even though he would deny seeing any resemblance of him. Since she was so tiny and born five weeks early I drove myself crazy making sure she ate enough, slept enough, reached all major milestones, etc. Basically I coddled her to pieces. Over the years she has proven to be a little challenging to raise. With each new addition to the family, the adjustment period has been long and trying. At one point last year, Rick and I barely had an evening where we weren't teary eyed talking about what to do with our little miss. But we survived, only slightly damaged. And I learned a lot about myself as a person and parent along the way. I'm definitely not the parent now that I was seven years ago.

This year we have had the privileged of watching her develop into a beautiful girl. I've never met anyone in my life that had such a strong idea of self. She loves her family. She is the best caregiver, most creative artist, and truly a loving soul. If I need an honest opinion I trust hers.

Somedays I think she is really my role model/parent instead of the other way around. I wish I had her passion and determination. There is no doubt in my mind that she will conquer the world and make friends while doing it.

Now I have a list of life regrets, but marrying my husband and having three wonderful kids are not on the list. They truly define who I am. All four are the greatest thing about me. So on this birthday eve, I find myself with mixed emotions. On the one side I will miss my 2.5 year old baby storming into the hall to tell me 'you are being ridiculous and I am being difficult' and the other side I am loving watching this little girl turn into a young woman. I am so proud of my girl and can't wait to see how she keeps growing and changing.

I know the dreaded tween and teen years where good old Mom is the enemy and can do no right are not too far away. I expect it and have seen tiny glimpses of it, but I'll survive. I know someday the two of us will sit and have a glass of wine and laugh about her childhood. Next to my husband, my mom is my best friend. I hope Gabby and I will have that someday. She is definitely someone I will want to know.

So to the world I say, 'stand back, hold on, my girl is coming.'
To her sisters I say, 'watch and learn from your big sister and know that if you need a friend, she is the best one you will ever have'.
To the grandparents I say, 'enjoy her while she still thinks you make the world turn. And love her for who she is, which is a pretty great gal'.
And to my love all I can say is, 'this has been an adventure so far and I'm sure the adventure will continue. But I can't think of anyone I would rather face these challenges and joys with. You are the world best Dad and Gabby is the loving wonderful gal she is because of you'.
Finally, to my Gabby I say, 'you've come a long way baby. I'm proud of the person you are. I admire your passion and spirit. Remember always be true to who you are. You have a better sense of self than a seven year old should have. Be true to that. And most of all, remember you are loved and that is the most important thing in the world.'


I love you my girl.
Happy Birthday

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